The Vanishing Prairie (1954)

Oh give me a home where the buffalo roam and the deeeeeeeer and the antelope plaaaaay…  But we can’t watch the buffalo roam too long.  We might see sights not fit for human eyes.  And that would just be terrible.

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When The Vanishing Prairie was first released, it was banned in New York State.  Apparently a scene where a buffalo gave birth was deemed inappropriate.  Even Walt was like, “Come on, guys, it’s just nature”.  Eventually, the censors relented and eventually New York State got to see Walt’s ninth True Life Adventure.  This one followed the lives of animals through the American Prairie, with a special focus on prairie dogs and the aforementioned buffalo.

It seems Walt and his team learned from some of the criticisms aimed at The Living Desert.  The Vanishing Prairie focuses much less on humor and presents animal lives in a much more realistic manner.  I, for one, think that’s a crying shame. But apparently I’m in the minority on that, because critics much preferred The Vanishing Prairie.  They loved the beautiful cinematography and the more professional approach to the natural world.  It even won an Academy Award for Best Documentary and a Gold Medal at the 5th Berlin International Film Festival.

I’m a little bummed that I apparently won’t have anything along the lines of the scorpion hoedown.  But maybe I’ll like this anyway.  Let’s find out!

STORY

Before we get started, the credits thank the Crowe tribe for contributing to the making of this film. Right on, Disney. That’s a step in the right direction. The magic paintbrush returns from The Living Desert to show how the Rocky Mountains and the Mississippi River split the United States into three pieces. We explored the Westernmost part last time, so this time we’re going to look at the middle: wide, flat grasslands known as the prairie. We go into detail about the settlers on the Oregon Trail and all the interesting rocks they found on their way. Courthouse Rock, Chimney Rock, Devil’s Gate, the Continental Divide… So many rocks. Prairie starts to not sound like a word after a while. It keeps going.

And then Disney just has to throw away all the credit I just gave them. They at least say that Natives were the first humans to live there, but they just have to call them “the red man”. And to make it worse, they say that we know about their myths because they kept records in “their own primitive way”. Ugh. I hate the 50s. Those myths centered around buffalo, antelopes, jackrabbits, prairie dogs, and other animals that provide food and materials vital to human survival. The magic paintbrush turns its animated birds into real birds so we can stop being astonishingly racist and get to the creatures.

Some ducks get to their pond a little earlier than planned, and the ice hasn’t melted yet. So they slip and slide on the frozen pond, set to comically dramatic music that sounds weirdly like the wedding march. But with more pratfall noises. Eventually the pond thaws and some geese land in graceful slow motion. A swan bites a duck because swans are terrible, and then the ducks pair off to mate. It’s at this point that I got a little concerned because if there’s one thing I wish I could unlearn and scrub clean out of my brain it is how ducks mate. Seriously do not Google this. You will regret it.

Luckily Disney spares us the screwy details and instead cuts to different species of grebes doing their funky little courtship dances. And that’s adorable. I am into that. Especially with the little flourish that plays when they paddle their little feets on top of the water. Once the deed is done, the red-necked grebe builds a nest on top of the water, and the male and female switch off who watches the eggs and who hunts for food. The piedbilled grebe does something similar, but the male has sole responsibility for watching the eggs. And he sucks at it. He wanders off with an egg still stuck to his feathers. The narrator pretends to be a long-suffering wife, lamenting how useless her husband is. But at least she finds the lost egg!

Our next featured animal is the whooping crane, which the narrator sadly tells us is near extinction with only a few dozens left. I Googled it, and it turns out that conservation efforts have actually brought back the whooping crane. They’re still endangered but there are now around 800 wild individuals. Yay! Though I’m sure laying one egg a year doesn’t help matters. They and the very similar sandhill cranes dance and hop around to attract mates, and then it’s time to move along. Next up is the sage grouse who has majestic tail feathers and a bizarre mating call. They puff air out of the chambers on their neck to make this honking noise. Their mating dance is so unique that apparently some Native American tribes imitate it in some of their own dances. Except the narrative makes it sound like there are no such things as Native American tribes anymore and sets the grouses’ dance to rather stereotypical music that brings to mind that one song from Peter Pan. I’m a little ashamed to have laughed at the scene but watching the birds’ neck pouches bob to the music was really funny to me for some reason.

Now the movie gets too hot for TV. At least in New York. We bear witness to the miracle of life as a mama buffalo gives birth to a baby. And considering this was like, the only interesting fact I had, it was like… that’s it? The sequence isn’t long. I bet most human moms wish their births were that quick and easy. There’s a tense moment where we’re not sure if the cute lil baby buffalo will live, but he lifts up his little head and wobbles to his lil feets. He falls right over, tries again, and falls right over onto his back. All the mama buffalo come over to encourage him but he keeps flopping over and oh my gooness you are so cute. Finally, he gets the hang of it and goes to nurse… the wrong mama buffalo. But he gets it.  The herd moves on, following the path they always use to get to water. In fact, the herds know where they’re going so well that Man the Invader used to follow them to get to the rivers. And yes, that’s the exact wording used in the film. It’s a very astute observation, and one that I am both proud and ashamed of. Good news, though: while buffalo populations are nowhere near are massive as they were in ancient times, they have recovered from the brink of extinction since this was released!

Another species that was near extinction in 1954 is the pronghorn antelope. Conservation efforts since have raised their populations from “doomed” to outnumbering people in certain states! We watch them run, showing that they’re the second fastest land mammals in the world. And they are majestic. One catches sight of the camera, and the music abruptly stops, only to start again when he goes back to his grazing. It cracked me up. I have no idea why this was so funny to me but I could not stop laughing. We also get to watch bighorn sheep climb 90 degree walls.

And then there are kitties! Mountain lions to be exact, but it’s a den of baby mountain lions who are fuzzy and spotty and little and they’re just lil kitties. Mama Mountain Lion shows how lithe and muscular she is by leaping straight over a mountain and climbing straight up a tree. She stalks a deer to feed her lil baby kitties, eventually pouncing. The baby kitties watch from afar, learning from their mama. Then they decide to practice by play fighting and oh my goodness they’re so cute must pet. Mama Mountain Lion leads her babies away from her and her milk and towards the dead deer so they can learn to eat solid food. And eat they do. Once they’re done feasting, Mama Mountain Lion buries the leftovers under some leaves to save them for later.

The movie then makes the point that big cat kittens are still kittens. We get to watch the lil baby kitties play and romp and climb trees. But one of them falls down! Oh no! Mama Mountain Lion goes to make sure her baby is okay. Of course he’s fine, because cats always land on their feet. Silly kitties. They’re not done getting into trouble, so they chase a frog right to the river. Naturally, they don’t like water so the frog gets away, but they still decide they’re going to try to eat some fish. It’s hard work, but they get it. Next on the menu is a squirrel, which the kitties chase over a branch that gets narrower and narrower as it gets longer. The baby kitties almost fall out of the tree, and the squirrel gets away while they’re trying to get back up. Meanwhile, Mama Mountain Lion has found a newborn fawn. The fawn lays perfectly still, with his spots making him invisible against the foliage. Mama Mountain Lion listens for him to stir, but he doesn’t, so she gives up and goes away, because apparently baby fawns have no scent. The more you know. When the danger has passed, the fawn prances towards his mama and it’s sooooo cute.

The bulk of this movie is dedicated to nature’s first permanent settlers: the prairie dogs. They chirp at each other and dig their extensive tunnels and also they’re really adorable and yes that is a theme here deal with it. They’re ingenious little architects, packing in dirt to make it stronger and building dams to keep floodwaters out of their burrows. A prairie dog drags grass down to make a bunch of sleepy baby prairie dogs comfortable and oh my goodness BABY PRAIRIE DOG BELLIES. MUST PET. The baby prairie dogs wake up to play fight, then get lost trying to find the surface world for the first time. Mama Prairie Dog comes to the rescue, leading her babies in the right direction… by crawling right over them. And seriously, the only thing that could possibly be more adorable than baby prairie dogs play fighting and eating their first taste of grass is bunnies! And indeed there are bunnies! And baby bunnies! Hanging out with baby prairie dogs! And baby prairie dogs grooming baby bunnies! I’m dying of adorableness!

A prairie dog from another colony gets too close, and one of the grown-up prairie dog chases him off Benny Hill style. But he’s not the only intruder the prairie dogs have to contend with. Far from it. A flock of burrowing owls stakes their claim, deciding that they’re going to build their nests here now. The prairie dogs are not thrilled about this, so the owls get ready to fight by making themselves all big and floofy. Apparently it’s an “age-old argument” over whether someone should own land just because they set foot on it. Spoken like a true white guy. But remember how I said the owls weren’t the only enemy? Yeah. A rattlesnake slithers by, and the owls immediately back off the prairie dog because the snake is clearly the bigger danger. Luckily for the owl, the snake isn’t interested in it. Unluckily for the prairie dog, he’s hungry for rodent. But Mama Prairie Dog is not about to take that lying down. She bites the snake and barks to scare it off, standing her ground until it needs a shade break… which it takes in the burrow.

We get introduced to the pocket gopher, which is weird looking and not cute. The prairie dogs try to make friends with their new neighbor but he’s not really sociable. He digs out his own burrow next door and ends up accidentally breaking through the wall between… throwing dirt all over the prairie dogs. The resulting “skit” between the prairie dog and the inconsiderate neighbor in the apartment next door was hilarious, especially because the gopher just doesn’t stop. Then it’s time for more cute, as a blackfooted ferret peeks into the burrow in the hope to eat a prairie dog. Their bodies are specifically evolved to get them into burrows… but first, they have to find their way. And that is easier said than done. Ferrets were apparently endangered, too, but once again, they’re doing better! So many success stories!

AND THEN THERE’S PUPPIES. Coyotes, specifically, which Disney still insists on pronouncing as “ki-yotes”. Was that a thing in the 40s and 50s? But they’re baby coyotes and they’re puppies with big old ears and big old feets. And they just sat on an anthill. Poor babies. Oh, no, they eat rodents. The prairie dogs dive underground, barking to warn each other of the imminent danger. Mama Coyote gets close to the sentry, who gets underground just in time. A badger comes by to menace the poor prairie dogs, too, who just really cannot catch a break. I didn’t realize there were badgers in America… or that badgers ate prairie dogs. He’s waiting by the exit to ambush a prairie dog, but joke’s on him because there are multiple exits. Sadly, one of them is right where the coyotes are standing. It’s okay, though, because this prairie dog has cajones the size of melons and bites and scratches until it successfully wards the coyote away.

Don’t feel too bad for our pupper friend.  There’s a jackrabbit passing by who will make just as good a meal… if Mama Coyote can catch it.  Which she can’t.  Again.  She takes out her frustrations on a passing rattlesnake, not to eat it, just to kill it because screw rattlesnakes.  She gets behind its head where it can’t see, and kills it with a snap of her jaws.  Meanwhile, the badger’s still looking for his dinner.  Fortunately, our fearless warrior doesn’t have to get his hands dirty again.  A male badger waddles by to try to impress her by… flopping on the ground.   They both start flopping and oh my god badger mating dances are glorious.

All these predators have tried to eat the prairie dogs and failed, so it’s time to celebrate! The prairie dogs bark happily to each other.. and the producers autotune it so it sounds like they’re singing to each other. It’s magical. It’s the closest this movie comes to that gloriously random scorpion hoedown from The Living Desert. Sadly, it doesn’t last long. Yet another predator, a falcon, swoops down to make the prairie dogs into dinner. And misses. These guys cannot catch a break. Once again, though, one of them does not give a heck and taunts the falcon, who dives again and misses. Again. I think he forgot how to falcon. A third try does manage to hit the prairie dog, but it only knocks him over and gives him the chance to get underground. The foiled falcon sticks his face in the hole but he doesn’t fit.

Even the herbivores are out to get the prairie dogs. Buffalo love a good dust bath, and there’s no dirt softer than what’s already been dug up by the prairie dogs.  They almost squish the prairie dogs but they’re so cute rollin around in the mud. Even the lil baby buffalo is rollin around and having a grand old time. Our old friend the prairie dog with No Fear bites the buffalo’s hooves to make them go away. Somehow he doesn’t get trampled to death but they also don’t go away, so he starts barking. The buffalo still don’t care, and get to work to fight for their mates. I’ve gotta say, buffalo look really weird when they’re mooing. Their tongues just roll and it’s kind of offputting. The males ram at each other, trying to use their hooked horns to force their rivals down the hills.

Clouds roll in, and a wicked thunderstorm kicks up. All the buffalo stampede to escape Mother Nature’s wrath, and not a moment too soon. Lightning sets the dry prairie grass ablaze. It’s beautifully shot… orrrr maybe that’s that pesky touch of pyromania talking. Fire is pretty. Anyway, all the animals run, and a rabbit somehow goes right through the fire and is perfectly fine. I’m sure the rabbit is just superimposed under the fire, but the narrator takes the time to point it out which is weird. Everyone makes for the pond to get out of reach of the flames.

But Nature’s fury isn’t over. The sky opens up, and rain pours down onto the empty flat land. The fire is out, but now the whole prairie is flooded. Bird nests float away and badgers have to find refuge with a prickly porcupine on a log. And I always thought porcupines were native to Africa? Anyway, the prairie dogs struggle out of the mucky ruins of their flooded burrows. They gather on higher ground and make the difficult decision to move their whole city. It got me in the feels a little bit. Not gonna lie. Some of the other animals, including a skunk and a porcupine, shake the water out of their fur. The coyotes howl at the moon to mark the end of the storm and a new beginning.

… except we go back to the bighorn sheep. The rams are, you guessed it, getting ready to mate. And doing what rams do best: ramming each other. It’s set to cheery classical music that sounds almost exactly like the tortoise joust from the Living Desert except not as good because these are not turtles. The pointless tacked on sequence ends with a mildly terrifying shot of a sheep through the mist. Look, sheep are weird and freaky-looking when seen up close, okay? Anyway, we finish up by talking about how the animals live on even though pioneers and Native Americans only live on the pages of history. And there is so much wrong with that sentence that I don’t even know where to begin! Hint: Natives still exist you absolute morons. There’s a note of hope in all the stupid, though: we as a species are trying to be better at not destroying everything we touch. And maybe the prairie can be saved before it vanishes completely.

I didn’t enjoy this one nearly as much as The Living Desert. It lacked the irreverence that elevated its predecessor from being another dry nature documentary. Oh, it tried to be sure, and there were definitely some amusing moments, but the moments of success were few and far between. And the mentions of Native Americans, treating them like some mythical beasts, have not aged well. It’s particularly bad because they clearly consulted with some Crowe representatives, so whyyyy was the narration written this way? Mostly, though, it’s just kinda dull, which is a big disappointment after how much I liked The Living Desert. Maybe The African Lion will be better? … oh, who am I kidding? It takes place in Africa. My hopes are not high.

ARTISTRY

This time around, the cinematographers relied a lot more on the beauty of nature and a lot less on staging, which is good.  There are few moments that were obviously set up, though, notably the interior of the prairie dog tunnels which, to be fair, would have been impossible to film naturally.  This movie was praised for its photography, which is gorgeous and really brings the environments to life.  I’m particularly impressed by the lengths the camera people went to to get some of their shots.  One of them got close to the buffalo herd by covering himself and his camera in buffalo pelts and pretending to be buffalo!

MUSIC

The music here is mostly Western flavored stuff that wouldn’t sound out of place in Frontierland.  Actually, I think some of it might be played in Frontierland.   Sadly, it’s not particularly memorable, and there’s nothing here that stands out as much as the tortoise joust or that beautiful, beautiful hoedown, other than the prairie dog singalong and the random instances of the wedding march.  One of the pieces was given lyrics and reused as Pioneer’s Prayer in the upcoming Westward Ho the Wagons, so that’s pretty cool.

THEME PARK INFLUENCE

The Living Desert is only one of the True Life Adventure films represented in the defunct Mine Train Thru Nature’s Wonderland.  The Vanishing Prairie wasn’t in a lot of it, but there were glimpses of coyotes and mountain lions posed to reflect shots from it.   I’ve already gone into detail about Mine Train Thru Nature’s Wonderland in the Living Desert review, so I’m not going to beat the dead horse.

FINAL THOUGHTS

I had high, high hopes for this one.  The Living Desert was so much fun, while still being informative.  This one tried, but because Walt was criticized for the very scenes I enjoyed, he made a serious effort to make this one a little more conventional.  I mean, good for him for taking constructive criticism I guess?  But it really detracts from the film.

Favorite scene: LITTLE BABY MOUNTAIN LION KITTIES PLAYIN AND LEARNING TO HUNT BY POUNCING ON EACH OTHER OH MY GOONESS SO CUTE

Final rating: 4/10 not enough square dancing